Oops.... Haha

So, it has been over a month since I have updated this. Oops. Haha. Well a lot has been happening.

I started a new job at Cavender's Western Outlet. Yee-Haw!!! I really like it there. We have a lot of fun and the people are pretty cool. I also finished up my semester and took my finals. Well I passed my classes! There are a few I wish I could have try harder in, well make that actually tried in. Haha. Also, all the old friends are rolling back in from their college lives back to normalcy so I have been catching up with them, and also saying goodbye to some friends who are starting new journeys soon.

And I am soooo excited because....... SUMMER IS COMING!!! Get ready!!!!

Love y'all!

Friend, friends, glorious friends.

So I realize I have neglected this blog for a few days, but in all fairness, I did warn you that I would. ;) Nonetheless, I am most grateful for the friends in my life that God has blessed me with. Just today,I signed onto facebook with two messages from some of my most treasured friends. I love them so much! Though God has taken all us to very different places, I know that each of these girls would have my back no matter what.

I am sad that I don't get to spend near as much time with them as I would like. Often times, I feel really alone because of where all my friends have ended up. My friend of wisdom and guidance, so you could say, is now living in Kansas. I love her dearly, and miss her gorgeous smile. It really does light up a room. My dear friend of comfort and a listening ear has such a crazy schedule, that it conflicts with my crazy schedule, and I unfortunately don't get to see her much. :( My giggle buddy and total goof ball friend is in Searcy where God called her to go to college. Though she gets to come up here occasionally, I so have had withdrawls from her this year. I was used to seeing her at least five days a week. It's weird how we take that time for granted and don't even realize. Thankfully, God has blessed me with my life long best friend who has practically been there with me since birth. I am thankful to get to spend time with this crazy girl!

To bring some sort of sense to this, today was one of those days where I just sort of felt alone. I have been really missing my friends and the time we used to get to spend together. Growing up is no fun! But somehow, in God's mysterious ways, a little encouragement is always sent my way. Today, it just so happened that encouragement came from a facebook message from my loyal friend, the giggle box.

Neely Ann- i miss you.
just sayin.
i will see you soon.
at least i hope.
you are wonderful.
your blog entertains me.
but that's not enough to satisfy.
i need some lindsey lovin' lol.

ps. remember those days of high school where we made fools of ourselves in musicals and such? spring sing is bringing back those good times. i wish you were on the stage with me.

I MISS YOU A TON!!but love you so much more!you are constantly in my prayers.
- Joshua 1:9

(which says, for those of you who may not know)
9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

So, even when I feel alone, and my friends may be far away, God is always with me. Wherever I may go.

A Time To Laugh

Ecclesiastes 3

A Time for Everything
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

Today's is going to be short. I have been in a pretty sour mood today. Though I am writing this insight about how I shouldn't focus on my negative feelings, it doesn't seem to be helping much. ;-) So it seems all of my emotional negativity is focused around one thing: hurts of the past. For some reason I tend to think about the past all the time. It's one of those things I just can't fully let go, something that randomly sneaks up on me and puts my whole day in a funk.

At the Link last night, Josh's sermon was titled "A Time to Die", and though this doesn't really have a lot to do with the sermon, he did ask one thing that caught my attention; Are we focusing our emotional energy on the hurts of the past and the worries of the future, instead of the season we are in right now? That one stung, because I knew I was very guilty of both. I need to realize that this is supposed to be a wonderful season for me. I am past the bad decisions of the past, I am young and in college. I should be unstoppable. I have all my dreams and my whole life ahead of me, yet I am letting some hurtful memories stand in my way. Forget that. Like Ecclesiastes says, there is a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance. Now is the time for me to laugh and dance, not weep and mourn the past. I have spent too much time on that. So it is deffinately "a time to throw away" all the hurts of the past, and submerge myself in the joys of the Lord.

Time for Singing

So today has been a tiring but awesome day. I did compassion unleashed today, a community outreach through the Link. I am pretty tired so I am gonna make today's short. I will more than likely write about Compassion Unleashed tomorrow; my mind is sleepy right now. I just woke up from a crash nap.

Nonetheless, I am probably so tired because I didn't go to bed until one o'clock last night. I was still thinking about all the need in the world, and getting ready for today made it a relevant subject. So instead of sleeping, I started playing around on my keyboard. I came up with an awesome music line, so of course I had to make lyrics to it. And what else would come to mind but all the need in the world that I could be helping meet? I blame Slumdog Millionaire. It some how drug on until one am, so this is what I came up with.

God of mercy
God of grace
Open my eyes
To see your face

The face of Your children
The face of the broken
The face of poverty
The face of the orphan

I cannot fathom
The need for Your love
I have so much more
Than most can dream of

I think I know suffering
Over the smallest thing
But then I take a glance
At another's circumstance

Break my heart
Lord, break my heart
Show me how
To love them now

I want to show them
The hope You bring
How You have given
Your life, as an offering

To ensure freedom
To ensure salvation
You offer a second chance
No matter the circumstance

Break my heart,
Lord, break my heart
Show me how
To love them now

Let them know,
The life You gave
When You died
And rose from the grave

I want to heal and
Restore the broken
Through Your love
So they may know freedom

♥ Break My Heart ♥

Richard and I rented Slumdog Millionaire last night. I really wasn't even sure what it was, but Josh Folliart kept recommending it at the Link. So, I figured I would give it a shot. The movie was great. It was all about a boy in the slums of India, and what he goes through just to survive. While watching the movie, you really feel compassion for the main character, Jamal. But while I was watching it, I couldn’t help but feel something else… something really saddening.

Those of you who really know me would know that I have a big heart for people. If I can help someone in some way, I jump up at the first word. It’s just the way God formed my heart.

So I realized this sad feeling was my heart, breaking for the kids in India. I had never seen a real depiction of life in India until the team from the Link went to India and showed their videos. Then to see this major motion picture showing the awful things Jamal went through, it really just breaks my heart. I can’t even imagine living a life in the way that so many thousands of kids live in India, and other slums in the world.

One of my most favorite songs is Hillsong’s Hosanna. There is just something about that song that is so truthful to me. Out of the entire song, though, the bridge is my favorite part:

“Heal my heart and make it clean, open up my eyes to the things unseen. Show me how to love like you have loved me. Break my heart for what breaks yours. Everything I have for your kingdom’s cause, as I walk from earth into eternity.”

Every since I first heard that song I prayed that those words would become evident in my life. Break my heart for what breaks yours. Open up my eyes to the things unseen. Show me how to love like you have loved me. If only everyone could think that way; to take off their blindfold and open their eyes and see the need in the world. I think so many people just turn the other cheek and choose not to see what is going on in the world. They don’t want to feel compassion because it means they will possibly feel sadness. I don’t want to be one of those people. I want my heart to break at the sight of starving kids, orphans in the slums, or a mother who can’t even afford decent clothing for her children. Getting your heart broken is the last thing most people want. Not me. I want my heart to break and feel at least a glimpse of what people who are really suffering feel. Not people who think they are suffering because they have to eat a can of soup that day because they don’t get paid until tomorrow, but people who don’t even get paid and would kill for that one can of soup.

I want to see what God sees. Not what the media shows us, blindfolded to reality. A full 20/20 vision of the truth, and not just so I can see it and know. But so I can do something about it. So I can give everything I have for the kingdom’s cause, for the cause of righteousness.

Lord, don’t just open my eyes and break my heart for your children. Give me the opportunity to change their lives, even if it’s in the smallest way.

2 Corinthians 1:3-7

3Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. 5For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. 6If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. 7And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.

Pink Elephant PJs

So, I have noticed that I have developed a pattern I follow almost every day. The first thing I do when I get home, whether it be from school or work or just hanging out, is go into my room, dig out my comfy pajamas and put on my sock booties. If you don’t know what sock booties are, you are really missing out. Anyway, I have this great pair of pajamas that my sister got me for my birthday this year. They are your traditional idea of a good pair of pajamas. They are the kind that button all the way down the front, are really loose all over, and even have pockets on either side of the row of buttons. You know the ones I mean; the perfect pair of pajamas. The best part is that the pattern is a bunch of pink elephants ice skating in the snow. I love these pjs. There is just something comforting about them when I put them on. After a good day or a bad day, I can slip into my pink elephant pjs and relax, care free. And they are so funny that I just can’t help but smile when I see myself in the mirror. My evenings just aren’t the same when those pink elephant pajamas are in the wash, instead of making me comfy.

In a very similar fashion, after an awesome day or after one I thought would never end, there is something beautifully comforting about slipping into the presence of God. I can go home, put on my favorite worship CD, open my Bible and instantly be comforted by the joys of the Lord. Just being humbled in the presence of our Father and giving up your burdens to Him is like coming home and taking off those pinching heels or that frumpy outfit and slipping into your most comfortable pair of pjs. All the stresses of that day just fall to the floor. So at the end of the day, why keep on those scratchy clothes when you could easily trade them in for something much more comforting. After all, the pink elephant pajamas have never failed to comfort me, and something tells me the presence of the Lord won’t let me down either. ;-)

*April Showers Bring May Flowers*

So, if you are anything like me, you have taken notice of the random amounts of rain we have been experiencing lately. Its spring, and April for that matter, which means it is going to rain a lot. Well, I was out walking the dogs today, like I do every Monday, Wednesday and Friday, and I started thinking; Today is a beautiful day (apart from the random gusts of 30 mph wind). Why can't everyday be like today? Rain is dark and gloomy, and it gets your pants muddy. While I was pondering that, God struck me with a notion; if it was perfectly sunny everyday and never rained, those sunny days wouldn't be appreciated quite like they are after a rainstorm. For that matter, if it never rained, we would be living in a desert, with no trees or pretty flowers. After all, April showers bring May flowers, don't they?

In that same sense, we tend to ask God, why can't I be happy all the time? Why can't things just run smoothly every day? Why do I have to suffer or go through pain? Well, my friend, if everything were perfect all the time, would we really appreciate it? We would have nothing to compare it to. Just like we compare the most awful rainy day to a spectacular sunny day, we would not know how good the sun felt if we had not felt the rain. Enduring the rain and making the most of the cloudy day makes us appreciate when the sun shines again. And in case you haven't noticed, the sun always comes after a storm. God is more interested in who we are then how happy we are. He is more interested in building your character through the storm so that next time the rain comes, you will be able to appreciate the darkness and draw nearer to Him. Once the storms have passed, the most beautiful flowers will grow, and you will appreciate their beauty, because you know what it took for them to bloom.